Pen and Moon

musings, life lessons & poetry from Theresa Jarosz Alberti

Category: Essay (Page 1 of 12)

The Messy Middle Is Where It’s At

May 22, 2024 / / 0 Comments

I think I’ve written about the Messy Middle before. Probably because that’s where I’m usually hanging out!

But no one else is, right?

As someone who grew up with a perfectionistic judgey voice in my head, I imagine that almost everyone else is keeping up much better than I am, That You All have some secret to life and are happy and organized and getting your stuff done, that I haven’t figured out yet. I see you #livingyourbestlife on Instagram and Facebook… that’s the way it is for you, right?

And me, I’m always feeling like I’m running-running-running, trying to catch up. I’m always behind.

I get it– this is all a myth, one that’s out there, one that’s in my head. The “everybody else has it figured out and I’m failing” myth. We all usually post photos of the good days, the special days, the pretty days. When I look at those posts, I compare my shit-days to your good-days, and then I’m back to judging myself. This is not a good plan to live by.

So I pause and remember to breathe, tell myself it’s okay, perfectionism isn’t a goal because it isn’t real or remotely possible. I can look around my Messy Middle Life and (breathe again) count the things I’m grateful for. There are so many. Remember comparison is the thief of joy (I think Brené Brown said that). It’s just good and okay to be here in my Messy Middle Life on my Messy Middle Couch. It really is.

Photo by Sahin Sezer Dincer on Unsplash.com

Re-Post: The Best-Kept Secret About Meditation, or What I Learned That Finally Made It Work

March 3, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I thought I’d revisit one of my more popular posts. I needed to re-read this myself, and get myself inspired to do some meditating again. It’s such a powerful tool that I often forget about! Enjoy.

I’ve had a love–hate relationship with meditation for most of my adult life. I’d hear about it from people who incorporated it into their life, or from books, stories of those who went on retreats to meditate in silence for days on end, or friends who woke up early to meditate every day.

Something about it appealed to me, the peacefulness of it, the idea of calming my anxiety, wanting to experience the… I–don’t–know–what, that keeps passionate meditators on their cushions every day. I didn’t really understand how to do it, though, so I looked for ways to learn.

I think my first experience meditating was in a college class, when I was going to school and working full–time. At the end of a long day, we lay on the floor in a dark room, and I fell asleep every time to the teacher’s soothing voice.

Continue reading

Lessons From the Lake

October 3, 2021 / / 4 Comments

It starts with an email: “I’m thinking about swimming tomorrow, anyone else?” More emails float in as the women in my water aerobics group weigh in on air temperature, how cold the lake might be, wind factor, how sunny it is, algae reports, our schedules. Usually one crazy voice saying “I’m going!” is enough to tempt a few others to join. 

This year, we are bolder, more daring, willing to tolerate some not-quite-ideal conditions to continue our swimming and water aerobics into autumn. We’ve been eager and giddy in the face of pushing past our goal date of Sept 15 (as I wrote about in part 1, The Mermaids of Lake Nokomis). We crank up the heat in the car on the way home after we emerge shivering from the water, and some have brought fluffy robes to wear afterwards.  Continue reading

The Mermaids of Lake Nokomis

September 17, 2021 / / 10 Comments

What does it take to find bits of magic in your life? Sometimes all you need is a lake and friends and a desire to move your body. That’s what happened for me.

It started in July of 2020. Many of us women had been taking water aerobics classes at the YWCA for years together, several times a week. We’d become a community who knew each other’s faces and stories, who laughed and breathed hard, and sometimes complained together.

When COVID came along, of course the Y and everything else shut down. As the summer ticked by, one of our members who had been a former water aerobics teacher had the brilliant idea to start emailing to see if anyone was interested in having some unofficial classes at one of the city lakes a few times a week. Everyone loved that idea. Continue reading

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