Welcome to Day 18 of my 30-Day Poetry Challenge!
Comment on today’s poem to win a copy of my poetry book, “(After) Confession… I’m giving away a copy every day. Scroll down below the poem for more details about this Poetry Challenge.
But first, congratulations, Fiona N, for winning a free copy of my poetry book! (I do a raffle from those who commented on yesterday’s post.) Fi, please email me your address so I can send your prize: firstname.lastname@example.org
Now onto today’s poem. Don’t forget to comment, and check back tomorrow to see if you’ve won!
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There’s a bit of a structure to this poem, so will look best on a computer screen vs. a phone.
You May Ask Yourself, How?
Sometimes my brain is not my friend.
Days like this, gray cloudy light,
so much crusty snow clinging
when it’s actually Spring.
Everyone is gone, surely doing
Important Things while I’m home,
alone in the too-quiet. I do
tasks but it never seems enough.
And this sleepy-cat-filled home
feels dreary and hopeless and
boring this afternoon.
It’s so easy for Mr. Super-Ego to
sneak in, start using my heart
like a trampoline, standing with his
verbal ice pick, start to chip
away at me. He is so very subtle, it
takes awhile for me to notice
that I’ve started thinking in
“Always” and “Nevers.” I feel
weighted down, diminished,
crabby, sad. Everything I do or
wish seems pointless. The
voice of the Judge inside
endlessly sneers and snarls:
What made you think you could?
Who do you think you are?
It has taken a long time for Me
to get aware, to see
this Charlatan for what he is,
just a voice in my Psyche,
not reality. I might still feel shitty,
but I don’t have to swim in
Today I choose to pick myself up, write
a crappy, god-forsaken little poem.
Put words on screen and let
the Voice natter on in the background.
I don’t have to be perfect,
I don’t have to be fixed,
this can be enough for now.
I can trust I’m okay, even when
okay feels so very far away.
[And okay, yeah, this is the reference for the title… it was just running through my mind. 🙂 ]
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- I’m writing and posting a new poem every day through the month of April (yikes!), for better or worse.
- AND, as a gift, I’m giving away a copy of my poetry book EVERY DAY this month. FREE!
- Sign up to WIN a copy of (After) Confession by just leaving a comment beneath the poem of the day.
- I will pick a winner every day in April! So comment every day for a new chance to win.
This month’s posts are part of the NaPoWriMo challenge — that’s National Poetry Writing Month. At NaPoWriMo.net, you’ll find links to other participating writers and their poetry. AND daily writing prompts for inspiration to write your own poems. Check them out.
I’m so looking forward to your comments– it doesn’t have to be about the poem. Write anything, share the name of your favorite poet or poem, write about the weather, whatever! And thanks for reading.
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Photo credit: Melanie Wasser, and Ian Espinosa, courtesy of Unsplash.com